U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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