My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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