I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
The adults are the big ones right?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
