...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
