im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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