Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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