i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
