why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
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