last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
