turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
In America we eat man semen.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
