I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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