sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
