I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
