Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
