Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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