Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize