Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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