oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize