that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
