he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
