i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
