Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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