Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
