i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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