you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
