Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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