She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize