Pappa wants mamma naked
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
