Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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