It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize