If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
