Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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