With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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