OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
