Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Randomize
