She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
