we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
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