My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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