You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
