pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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