There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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