OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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