i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
