yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize