Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
