i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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