I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
