it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
