Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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