Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
