were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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