another moral hangover. fuck.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
